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Discussing The Death Of My First Child

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I married my high school sweetheart when I was 19. Nineteen is young -- too young to get married and definitely too young to have a baby, but I didn't think so at the time. So a month after the wedding, I threw away my birth control and started perusing baby books. I expected to see the two telltale positive lines within the first cycle -- I mean, I spent all of high school being terrified of pregnancy, as if it might just happen, intercourse or not. Instead, I bought -- and threw away -- three First Response tests a month, for eight months. Every month, the arrival of my period brought tears. I tracked my cycle, my cervical mucous, my BBT (Basal Body Temperature). My 19 year old friends...

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